”He wasn’t wrong. “Mom, he...”“I know, I know, he’s talking out of his ass. He doesn’t know us and the type of people we are. But still, he’s not totally completely, one hundred percent off-base. I know that I’m not like other people, other moms. That doesn’t mean I don’t love you. It just means ... it’s different. When I was younger, I kept waiting for that parting of the skies and the outstretched hand of God moment. That one defining event that would break through and make me like other people, you know?“I thought it would be my first boyfriend, then when I gave up the cherry, then when I got married and then finally when I had you. It never happened. There’s just a distance between me and other people. For the most part, I just don’t give a crap. Not about them or what they think of me. But I do about you. Maybe not as much as I should, but I do love you.”Leaning back into the cushions, I just stared at her and listened. This was the deepest conversation we’d ever had and. But idk how necessary it all is. As a man I like to wear loose fitting clothing, clothing I can move around in. I like to wear pants and shirts that are kind of plain and of sturdy not so soft materials. And Idk why everyone doesn't see their clothing this way. The fact is that society has brought up the genders into some gender specific materialism, that seems to be some underlying fetish. I think trans men feel this way too. But I wouldn't know. I feel like I should wrap this up somehow. But I will save that for another day. I also wanted to add that the past few times I've had sex with a male or another crossdresser, when it came to climax. I wasn't able to. Though I really enjoyed being fucked, he stopped because he wanted his turn. I just wasn't able to return the favor. I suppose more experimentation is to come...no pun intended, haha that was a bad joke, I know. I am not sure if I'll ever have a clear answer. Huge part of me just wishes I was just a straight man. Yet another.
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